You’ve found your spot and you’re finally ready to rest for the night. It feels like five, maybe ten minutes when all of a sudden, your alarm goes off. You wake up and what are your first thoughts? “another day, another dollar”, “here we go again”, or my favorite, “is it Friday yet?” if this sounds like you, you are not alone. Don’t you love being an adult? Or better yet, having to act like an adult 90% of your life. I mean, bills have to get paid, your family has to eat, you practically have to work to pay bills and survive. Am I right? Even though our everyday lives consist of a routine, I’m here to tell you it’s time to break that habit. When was the last time you actually put yourself first above anyone else? If you have children you tell yourself they come first above anything else, but when was the last time someone made sure you were okay? You see, husbands/wives nor children understand what it’s like to put everyone else first besides yourself. If you are a stay at home mom, you get judged for not working, not having a career, pretty much for being a “bum”. Well, that’s not true. Even though you’re not really actually getting paid to feed others, or to clean after their mess, or to cook for them, you’re there to make sure everyone’s sanity is okay. The same goes for moms that work. You’ve had a long day, you get home and you immediately switch to mom/housewife mode. It’s fucken hard. No one warned us how hard it is to survive in the real world. Nothing gets handed to us, nothing in this world is free. Anxiety, depression, is real. If you’re reading this and often feel like your life consists of a routine, I’m here to tell you that you need to break that habit, that you need to start caring about yourself more than usual. You’re a single mom, so what? You’re going through a divorce, so what? You’re worried about next week’s test, so what? How do you think you’ll survive without self-care? When was the last time you asked yourself if you were okay? or maybe you just need someone to hear you out? Maybe you just need a hug from a friend and someone to tell you-you’re doing just fine? When was the last time you really disconnected yourself from social media? Self care is real and it’s important. Without caring for yourself you leave no space to care for others. You know those days where you get home stressed from work? It’s real, and it affects your family. Why would anyone want to live under your negative cloud? Work and homework start piling up, but you leave no space for yourself because you think it’s SELFISH. Let me remind you that self-care reduces the negative effects of stress and promotes a healthy work-life balance. Make self care a daily act that’s part of your routine, and I promise, you will start feeling better about yourself.
Here are a few ideas to get you started, but remember, make it a daily routine.
- Try a new fitness class- (For real though, how many times have we told ourselves we need to work out? But not just to look good in the outside, but to feel better in the inside. Remember, you physically want to look good, but you also want to emotionally feel better. Not to mention, you’ll be more energized after that workout, get it, girl!!).
- Read a book- (How often do we say we don’t have time to read? instead of being on social media before bed, grab a book or a magazine and start reading. Trust me, it’s good for the soul).
- Eat Healthy- (Guys, this is real. How often do we eat like crap and feel like crap? leave that nasty junk food aside and look up some delicious and healthy recipes).
- Sleep routine- (We often go to bed late because “We can’t sleep.” We can’t sleep because we either have too much on our minds or because we’re just not tired. Find a routine after dinner. Go for a walk, take a warm bath, and get ready for bed. Remember, our bodies need at least a good 7-9 hours to function. Set your alarm clock, but for Pete’s sake, put that damn phone away).
- Church- (This may not be for everyone, but perhaps you’ve fallen out of your routine of not attending church? Maybe you’re the type of person that needs to connect with others to bring you closer to your beliefs? If so, try going back to release some stress and to focus on yourself).
- Friends/Family- (When was the last time you shared some good laughs and memories along with the people you love the most? Go out and spend time with them. Release stress and talk about your day, talk about your feelings. Better letting everything out than in. At least for your own sanity).
- Goodbye Electronics- (You can get a break from social media and believe it or not, you will not die. When having dinner, put that phone away. Movie night with the kids? Shut the phone off. We sadly tend to put our attention to other people around the world than our own family. Make sure you make time for them and not those memes or videos you keep scrolling to every five minutes).
If you want to survive, put yourself first above anything else. If these ideas don’t work for you, find something that does. Maybe you’re the type of person that needs a vacation to clear your mind, or perhaps a spa date. But above that, remember that self-care is something that should be taken seriously by taking care of your own mind and body. You know the saying, “if you don’t love yourself first no one will,” well it’s entirely true. If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of those precious little creatures that call you mom. If you can’t take care of yourself, no one else will. And please, take 30 minutes of your day, to focus on you.